Change is Hard #realtalk

I had such great intentions of doing a blog a week full of amazing content for my readers, but you know what they say about good intentions. My website, my work, is all about Embracing Authenticity, so I'm going to get a little real with you myself; it's a part of my recovery, breaking through my own porcelain. It's how I practice being vulnerable, and flawed, and being okay if the world doesn't see my as perfect. So here we go, a little #realtalk...

So much has changed for my little family in the past few months. We were trucking along in life, a pretty darn good life, and my husband was offered a new job that would require us to relocate. It was a great offer, something we'd been hoping for, so we agreed to make the change. My husband started the job soon after, so I stayed behind with three littles (one only 4 months old at the time) to sell our home and wrap up my work with my clients at my job. Those two months were tough--I didn't get to see my husband except on weekends and I got a tiny taste of what it's like to be a single parent (Seriously, hats off to every single parent out there making it work for their kiddos. I have oodles of newfound respect and reverence for the difficult work you do every day!). I packed our whole home on my own, said goodbye to treasured friends, and juggled the release of my self-help book, selling our home, purchasing a new home, and pulling my oldest out of a school he loved (we loved it, too).

Then me and the kids made the move after our home sold. It was just 4 days after Christmas that we hauled everything to our new locale and put 3/4 of it into storage while our new home is being built, and settled into our temporary apartment. A few days later, I jumped into prepping my new therapy office and finding all new everything for our kids: pediatricians, dentists, preschools, nannies, etc. There was a lot of Do, Do, Do, Do, DO.

But now things have quieted down and I'm facing the feels, the good and the bad. I'm so excited about my husband's new job and the great benefits it offers our family (Guys, I get to audit classes at the local University for free! I'm a proud school-nerd and I can't wait to take a bunch of classes. No, for real--I already made a list and it's like 86 classes long...Squee!). We're closer to some of our family, I still get to practice the job I love, and we are so fortunate to be building a beautiful house that I can't wait to make our home.

With the good, comes the not-so-great. I've also been anxious, afraid, disappointed, homesick, angry, and deeply sad in the month since our lives have changed so much. I vacillate between Mary Poppins Mom and Batman (a la Christian Bale, not George Clooney) Mom when my nerves are raw and my kids are acting like caged animals...in a much smaller space than they are used to...in the middle of a Northern Utah Winter. I've cried more kinds of tears than I thought imaginable. I've hidden in my closet with a Snack Bag (resealable!) of mini-Golden Oreos trying to fill the void that can't be filled with food. I've had to face the truth that change, any kind of change, is hard.

For all you out there going through changes, whether good or bad, I want you to know that you're not alone. Change is hard--even good change. It just is. And that's okay! Even when things are changing for the better, we're still allowed to struggle through the newness of our situations. It's okay to cry in the face of uncertainty and feel wistful for the old and the comfortable. Whatever you do, don't isolate yourself in the struggle. Talk to your trusted loved ones, let them know you are struggling so they can support you, comfort you, and bolster you up. Don't judge yourself harshly (or at all) for having a hard time. Honor your feelings and experiences without placing labels on them like "bad" or "ungrateful" or "pointless." Feel what you feel.

Once you've honored the difficult, look forward with hope. Find the things in your new situation that bring joy and opportunity to your life. Give yourself something to look forward to, no matter how small. Practice good self-care. Breathe. Breathe some more. The rough feelings might return--the bigger the change, the bigger the chance. Let it be okay. Take care of yourself through it. Because, you know what?

Change is Hard.